wow, it's been a while

okay just a week.
i miss blogging every day.
but i know none of you really care about what goes on in my life.
hehe that's too bad.

this past week was vbs. i was reunited with the cutest boy in the whole world, aaron hung. i met him last year, nd i fell in love at once. this year, as vbs was coming up, i just couldn't wait to see him again. luckily, he remembered me :) he's just so cute, i can't keep my eyes off him. he'd tap my shoulder nd i'd be like :o who did that ?! nd he'd giggle nd seconds later he'd say meee ;) omg whatta cutie. he learns so fast nd he's so good at everything hehe. i was racing with him on saturday night. he won like 30 of our little mini-races, nd i won like, 4. :[ haha it's okay. but his sister nd some other guy kevin joined us. kevin wanted to come up with a race but when we did it, aaron lost, nd was last. he didn't even finish the race ! aww :[ so i went to go cheer him up cuhs he looked really sad. that was the second time that day..i was definitely worried. after a while, he started crying, with tears streaming down his face. but eventually i cheered him up hehe. it's amazing, i never know what to say when someone is crying. i'm not too great at cheering people up. but when little aaron was crying, God gave me the wisdom and the right words to say so that i could make him happy again :) i carried him to his car nd said, come back next year okay ? nd i know they will hehe. i miss aaron already ! btw, he's like four or five years old, don't get the wrong idea. hahahahah

so uhh, REEEEEEWIND. friday night, i slept over at annie's house with angela. annie knocked out at like 1, but angela nd i stayed up talking til like, 4:30 haha. we didn't eat breakfast the next morning. angela curled her hair, and annie straightened my hair & her own. it looked quite nice hehe i loved it. i wish my hair was naturally like that..but it's not. so that's too bad -_- hm so then we went to puente hills mall, where i think i saw scott, that fobby guy. i also saw arnold nd tommy & miguel. annie was wondering why all my friends are guys -_- oh but hey, i saw chris & steph teng too ! ahhaa, not all guys. so we watched my sister's keeper, where we all cried our eyes out. it was the saddest movie ever. then we watched the proposal, which was just absolutely hilarious. after that, we went to kublai khan for some mongolian grill, and now i know to get my own order next time -_- we disagreed all over on what to get, how spicy it should be, yada yada yada..nd i wasn't full after just eating a third of it, yaknow ? but then we went to dairy queen. i've decided : next time i'm going to get a strawberry cheesequake. hahaha so then we went to aeropostale, forever 21, and generation v. oh yeah angela had a buncha mcdonalds too. we also went to sears, cuhs i completely forgot that hon gets off of work at like, 2:30 -_- that was a fail, on my part. so my mom called while we were in generation v, nd we left. went back to annie's to change, went to church to drop off annie cuhs she was the only one who had to get there early. nd we were all thirsty hehe so we went to arco / ampm to get ourselves some drinks. mommy nd daniel got arizona nd angela nd i got icees. mm mm good :) i want some more.. haha. so we went back to church where we waited for vbs graduation to start. that all happened. i "met" benson ho, but..i think i used to know him. cuhs his name sounds familiar and his face seems familiar..it's all quite confusing. but whatevers. after it all, there were refreshments, where i stuffed myself with everything. i'm such a fatty -_- ayeeeeee whatevers hehe i only had an apple for lunch today..

sunday, we took down vbs decorations, and i helped randall enlarge his tapeball. it had.."impurities" hehe. but it's okay, it ended up as slightly larger than last year's. good luck next year, randall ;) then we went to barnes & noble nd the starbucks in there. i've decided i like fraps better than smoothies & vivannos. then we went to target, where i saw todd ! omg it's been a while, definitely. he hugged me haha. i don't recall that EVER happening before. it's all kinda weird how i look back nd think about how i used to like him..i don't know if he ever knew. too bad he moved, i miss him so much. we talked about my old house, chuck [inside thing], how i moved to westco but i'm still goin' to rowland, the fact that i wasn't alone at target, and pink dolphins. HAHA all in like, 10 minutes. aw, i really do miss him mucho. then we went to the old house to move some more stuff to the new house. oh yeah, at target i bought a buncha things to spice up the new bathroom HAHA. i want it to be colorful. i also bought a dress, two tanks, and my first v-neck.

today i ran alexdale with the tennis team after basketball practice. it wasn't bad, i just wish people wouldn't give up so easily. i ran in flip flops guys, come on ! nd i was still like, 5th place, out of like 12 of you or something. so uh yeah, that was fun. i watched them hit & i tried it myself after. I SUCK LIKE NO OTHER OMG -_- hahahahah it's just so awkward holding the racquet.. :[ mm, dropped off dab & angie at the library. we talked about wesley today. but that was earlier haha. i went to target again, to return some stuff & buy more stuff. this time i didn't see todd. HAHA so uh, went to the old house to get more stuff, annie's house to get some stuff i had left there -_-, kfc / kgc. came back, ate, went on the internet. i'm so tired right now ! i should totally sleep. game tomorrow ! let's hope we do well. mm i just wish life wasn't so hard & stressful. i've got so many things to think about, so many plans, so many birthday presents to think of, so many hangouts to plan, so many people to hang out with. i just wish summer was a little bit longer. health is doing just fine.

i think i'm gonna sleep now.
i'm thirsty.

peace outt !
love, lyd <3

HEYHEYHEY

hehe today was father's day.
actually, yesterday was, since it's 12:10 am. but that's too bad, i'm gonna talk like it's before 12 hehe

so i went to church, all the usual stuff happened. finished up vbs decorations nd stuff. then i came home, slept for two hours, woke up sweating -_- EW. theeeen we went to maxim cafe. me, the brother, the mother, the father, and the mother's parents. saw the Hou's, the Zuniga's, and abe & jem ! omg ! hahah it was exciting, but i think they thought it was kinda awkward. too bad, it was exciting. i helped my brother make his attendence chart, and we listened to the vbs music like a bajillion times. that's about it. g'day.

peace outt
love, lyd <3

every day's a brand new day

hehe isn't that one of ross's songs ? or whatever..

today was a swell day !
uhh..

so i'm not gonna be too detailed today. mm jasper got a haircut. monica told me to put some pants on. we ran a suicide then a 17 right after at the end of practice. brian was wearing yellow. drumline went to the beach. grandparents' house, as usual. btw, not in chronological order, once again. MIGHT hang out with hon on tuesday. yay ! hung out with charlene, annie, nd evelyn for a couple of minutes. ate 10 cherries after dinner and spaghetti for lunch. <- just goes to show how much this is in order..so yeah. i had a fine day. didn't really talk to too many people that i normally talk to. hated the car rides cuhs i was sitting under a box -_- dad pissed me off, as usual. i'm up past my bedtime, as usual. i've been on youtube this whole time. happy late birthday to malerie. is that how you spell your name ? and happy late birthday to melissa kamiyami. and happy birthday to harrison. and tomorrow's my mommy's birthday. anywho.

peace outt
love, lyd <3

p.s. "try" by jesse barrera :) wonderful song.
p.s.s. vbs cleanup tomorrow ! funfunfun :)

hi guise

yeah i just had to do that once. it's such a cool word.
by the way, i think "karen" would be really pretty spelled like "karyn" hehe idk

ANYWHOOO
today was a great day :)
except for when my dad came home. at like, 10:30 pm or so.
he just always seems to kill my day..ugh.
anyways, lemme tell you about my day, cuhs i really haven't done so in a while. hehe

june 18th, 2009
i can be pretty descriptive sometimes. so uhm, i woke up around 9:05, as usual. my alarm is set to 9:00, but i press snooze like, once haha. i got ready, but of course i felt like wasting some time. but suddenly at 9:30, my dad says LET'S GO ! and we're not supposed to leave until like 9:40-45 ish. so i was confused. but whatever, i rushed through getting ready & off i was to summer school. it was early and nobody was there, so i went to see if the gym was open, hoping to see eric chang inside so i could say hi :) but it wasn't, or at least not where i was looking. so i turned around and saw people in the tennis courts, and thought, hey ! it's tennis practice ! so i started walking toward the benches, but on the way i saw dabbie pan. she told me to sit with her, so i did. we started talking about her birthday, and we came up with some funfilled plans. we're not sure if it's all happening yet, but we sure hope so :) soo at around 9:50ish we started going towards the quad or wherever. the bell rang, and i called jasper cuhs we always go to class together but he said he wasn't at school yet so i waited while i departed from dabbie. jasper got to school, wearing the shirt i made him :) we walked to class and endured an hour before nutrition. i don't remember what we did at nutrition but i remember eating some of brian's chicken patty / spicy chicken / whatever it was hehe. and nicole told jasper he wore that shirt on saturday. hahahah. oh yeah, nd i called kevinlim to ask if he wanted to hang out haha. the overall answer i guess was "sure" hahahah. i told him to call me when he got to school. that was actually the first thing that happened at nutrition. anwho, the bell rang. we went to class and endured it for another hour nd a half. then the bell rang ! yay ! kevinlim didn't call yet, so jasper nd i went to the benches in front of the hideout to wait. on the way there, jasper suggested going to joan's house. & he asked if kevinlim could take him home. hahahah i asked him to come hang out with us but he had to go to costco with his dad. so jasper called joan and told her that two people wanted to go to her house, nd she had to guess who. eventually she figured it was me nd kevin, but hehe idk what happened. so through a complicated process, we went to david's house instead. before that, jasper nd i ate my curry noodles, kevin came, jasper got shotgun, we took jasper home, i moved to the front, then we finally went to david's house. on the way there, kevin was complaining about stuff that annoyed him haha. i miss those convos on his car :) so when we got there, david was taking a shower haha. nd we sat there for like a minute or two then decided to say hi to his grandma and go to his room. that happened. hahaha david took the longest shower. in the meantime, kevin was reading some usc article or something on the internet, nd i explored david's room full of gadgets and gizmos galore. david finally came out of the shower nd he was like whoa you guys are already here ? hahaha i wonder what it's like to come out of the shower and find some friends in my room just doin' their own thang. i think that'd be quite amusing & fun hehe :) anywho. so i showed kevin and david my blog, cuhs of those senior posts down theree. kevin read his out loud -_- really loud..on purpose. hahaha whatevers. david warned us to use straws or wash soda cans before we drink out of them cuhs someone died due to dried rat urine. i know, crazy right ? hahaha so then we watched youtube videos. joan came, with a hungry tummy & some instant noodles hehe. after a while, kevin nd i left while joan nd david were left to make their music video for the jesse barrera "try" cover contest thingamabob. i wish i were a part of that. i just watched it nd it was beautiful :) hehe i love joan's voice & david's guitar-playing & i love their creative ideas for music videos. amazing hehe. so kevin was gonna drop his yearbook off in joan's car, but her window wasn't open big enough so he had to go back in david's house to give it to her, while i got on the car. he came back, and off we were to the hub cafe ! there, i met..kevin's "nainai", vivian, the manager, and his son. i didn't really meet the manager, but whatever. i met his son. hahahah i forgot his name :[ i feel bad. i'm gonna ask kevin next time i see him. so kevin ordered some noodles nd boba & forced me to eat. even though i had a game in an hour..aye. so i had a little bit, but i was playing connect four with the boy, so i didn't eat too much, cuhs kevin ate a lot. cuhs it was good :) i'm sure if i didn't have a game to go to, i would had more boba. hahahah so yeah. i beat the boy at first, but then i started making stupid mistakes cuhs idk why, i just couldn't focus on finding ways to beat him. so he kept beating me in the end. oh yeah, i started off playing connect four with kevin, until the food & the boy came. haha then kevin wanted to eat so i started playing with the boy. i seriously don't remember his name -_- but he goes to this school that my friend used to go to. so after we finished our food, kevin got his paycheck and he helped clean up. oh yeah, cuhs he works there. hahahah that's why we went. then we went to mcdonalds, where he also works. he had to fill in this survey, even though there was like 15 minutes til i was supposed to be at school. i went to the bathroom & when i came back kevin was already like done. hahaha what a fast survey-taker :) so the people took forever to get him his paycheck, but he finally got it & i got to school right at 4:00 ; perfect. oh yeah btw kevin hsu was working at mcdonalds when we went :) his hair was different ! not gelled. hehe. i miss my seniors. so when i got to school, my coach just got there too haha. mm i went in, changed, nd was scared for my first game on jv. i didn't go to practice the day before, which made me even more scared. but while we were warming up, i wasn't doing so bad :) game time ! i didn't expect to play much cuhs i wasn't at practice on wednesday, but they put me in ! omg. dabbie was watching. so they put me in as a 3 when i was supposed to be a 4 so i was kinda confused but it's all good. then when i was a 4 i kept playing a 3 on defense. so idk -_- i still haven't made my first shot yet, but it'll come. we won ! against los altos ; 29-19. i was so happy :) i remember my first game on the frosh/soph team. we lost reeeaaaally bad against upland ; 9-40 or something like that. idk, it was really bad. so yeah. i called my dad nd went outside where i saw dabbie. she made me play a little tennis on the wall, even though i suck miserable. my dad came, asked me if we won, asked me if i made a shot, as usual -_- got home, took a shower, ate dinner, went on the internet, yada yada yada..watched so you think you can dance result show. cried before i went to sleep cuhs of some sort of realization that i feel uncomfortable mentioning here. texted ariel, but idk if she got it cuhs she lives in vantage pointe nd she never mentioned it. so uh, yeah. that's pretty much my day. but before i went to sleep, my dad was pissing me off -_- as usual. ugh. that killed my day. but overall, wonderful day. got to hang with the di yi ge favorite senior, which was fun. picked up paychecks with him nd had convos on the car, haha. youknow youknow ;) can't wait til the hangout with me, kevinlim, nd honhoang :) that was decided on the car. but time still yet unknown.

peace out babes
love, lyd <3

p.s. this is a really long post -_-
p.s.s. yes, i know it's not exactly all in chronological order, and i used "oh yeah" a lot. but too bad ! :)

love youuu <3

'o9 we will never forget [continued]

for the rest of you seniors : i know i wasn't too close to you guys. but don't worry, you guys [and gal] mean a lot to me too. and the impact continues..

david pak - birthday buddy ! :D yeah i know, you never thought you'd ever meet someone with the same birthday as you. but you know i felt the same. all my life, i knew people born on december 20, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 29.. haha but never 28. and i just thought to myself, maybe i'll never meet someone born on the same day as me. then one day after school i'm like, hey you're david pak right ? nd you freak out cuhs i'm sucha creepy stalker. i say i'm abe's friend and you say that it's awkward. LMAO thanks -_- hehe so one other day you're in a lunch line & i'm in a lunch line near you. so i'm like, hey ! and i try to make conversation and once again, you say it's awkward. HAHAHAH wow, am i really that awkward ? :/ so then it's like, "when's your birthday ?" "december 28" "wait what ?" "december 28" "are you serious ?!" "yeah.." "seriously ?!" "yeah.." "omg that's my birthday too !" "wait, seriously ?!" "yeah !" "omg what the.." "WHOOOAA that's so weird !" etc. hahahah yeah the last few parts were made up. but they were along the same lines ! lmaoo so yeah. then i remember chris & steph teng's church. that was fun. hehe i wore your shirt & slept with my head on your lap. okay that sounds weird -_- then you took me & erictan home ! love story was playing on the radio hehe. & that time we were on the phone after you saw me on the street.. LMAO okay this is getting too long. NEXT ! haha jaykaay :) but it is getting loong. i'm gonna miiss youuuuu birthday buddy ! <3

kevin hsu - hey you ! haha i remember watching you ask little freshman girls like tawnya and nicolekanow to massage you in awkward places like your stomach. HAHA whatta weirdo :) i remember the first time i talked to you. it was a while before one of my basketball games, and i was talking to david. you were walking next to him. it was the sausage sticker day & i didn't know you were kevin hsu. one of you asked me if i knew where those were from nd i said something about kevin hsu. nd you were like, i'm kevin hsu. nd i was like, really ?! OOHHH hahahah :) so that's how we met ! but we never really talked much. i was on kevinlim's car with you a bajillion times. i've been in your..apartment ? room ? haha whatever it is..i remember jack and i were watching kevinlim look for his uniform in your laundry haha. i remember you played me a song and i liked it LMAO and i remember you used to always play that song "1, 2, 3, 4" by the plain white t's. you're so funny sometimes. i'm gonna miss you too :)

eric tan - max poweeer :D hahaha idk how you came up with that name. but it's pretty funny how i'm actually willing to call you that. HAHA yeah, i never really called you that every time i saw you :) those high fives were pretty hard & painful, but i know that's what you were goin' for hehe. you and adam are like, inseparable huh ? how cute ! lmao. so i'm glad i got close to kanow nd jess this year cuhs i woulda never met you without them :) i'll never forget those crazy million-attempt high fives haha. & i know every time i see you you're gonna just keep tryin' hehe. if you come back nd visit, i just might sing for you ;) i'm gonna miss youuu ! <3

edward choi - hey ed ! haha i remember asking you if you know my name. & you did ! hehe yaaay :D so you too, i woulda never met you without kanow & jess. from reading your blog, i know you struggle a lot, and i know we're not too close, but i just wanna wish you the best of luck with life. you're gonna go through many more hard times, just know that. and be ready for what's comin' to you. you'll always have your second family there for you, and i know it from the way they feel about you. don't ever forget about them, and make sure you keep your priorities straight. good luck in college and with everything else. & i'm gonna miss you too :) <3

myles - haha yeah, i don't know your last name. i know, it's in my yearbook but i'm too lazy to go check ! i remember when i first heard your name, i thought it was such a cool name haha. i'm pretty sure i met you cuhs of eric chang :) haha i remember the tball thingy or whatever. that was so fun, i thought i'd make a fool of myself but i thought i did pretty good in the end ! LMAO so uh, we didn't talk much this year, but i'm glad i met you :) you're i really nice guy, nd i hope to see more of you in the future. good luck with everything, & come visit ! hehe. gonna miss you loots :) <3

christina hwee - i've noticed you're the only girl on my list. haha. i hope you liked my shirt :) and yeah, we didn't talk too much this year, but i remember when i met you. we were jammin' in the lunch area after school during this teachers' meeting. and my brother came along. something happened.. ?! haha then you were like, he's your brother ? nd i'm like yep. and that's how we met ! haha i think..& i remember you thought i was cute hehe. well i think you're cute too ;) so i just wanna congratulate you on everything you've accomplished in your life, cuhs i know it's a lot. i hope you continue to do well in everything, and keep working hard for what you want to succeed in. i know you'll continue accomplishing a lot, and i wish you the very best. good luck, congrats, & keep up the good work. love youu ! <3

richmond reyes - hey youuuu ! don't ever forget the high-five hug mkay ? hehe. idc if you do that with anyone else. in my mind, it's our thing. haha. i remember watching you, jack, kevin & kevin play pool :) it was so fun watching you guys "know" you were gonna win LMAO. i remember waiting for you at dolphin bay for like half an hour. and i remember going to the 99.99 cent store to buy chips with you :) i remember the rides & you always wanting to hear me sing. i remember all the times we said we haven't talked for a long time :[ i'm gonna miss you a loot, richmond ! i'll never forget the high five hug haha. love youuu <3

kevin guiang - helloo :) i remember the first time i saw you, you were dancing in front of the windows of the hideout. i was like, who is that guy ? hahaha then you started talking to david and we introduced ourselves to each other. then i watched you guys play pool like, three times ? haha i remember that one time we went there from dolphin bay, mad was playing on the radio & i started singing. you turned the music down so you could hear me sing & richmond killed it for you LMAO. good times, good times :) i miss watching you guys play pool. i don't even remember the last time i went. let's go again in the summer, yeah ? hehe i'm gonna miss youu <3

chris yao - haha let's seeeeee. i remember before i met you, i'd always see you around & i'd see your myspace nd everything. then one day we were playing basketball with kevin lim's little brother, & i was like hi i'm lydia. nd i forgot what you said your name was but you didn't say chris. haha nd i was like no, your name's chris. i know, creepy right ? ;D hahahah so i guess that's how we met :) then i remember talking on myspace haha about senioritis & stuff like that ! those were good times hahahaha. i remember seeing you between first and second period in the morning but never saying hi, hahahha idk why :] wells i'm gonna mees youu ! good luck in college & stuff. hehe <3

so uh, this was a failed attempt at a goodbye present to all of you guyss, and i'm sorry if i didn't write one for youu. don't worry i still love youu <3 every day's a new day, so live your life to the fullest, no regrets. you guys are goin' off to college VERY soon & i'll miss you like heck. you've done so much to make my year what it was, and most of you probably don't even know it. goodbye, class of 2009. you'll never be forgotten. i will always love each and every one of you <3 TOODLES.

'o9 i will never forget.

peace outt
lyd <3

'o9 we will never forget

gosh, you don't even know how confused my emotions are right now.
excited for the summer, when i'll get to hang out with some of you guys ; or happy for you guys, cuhs you guys are goin' off into college, out of high school where you've been stuck under someone else's authority for four years ; or sad cuhs you guys are leaving and the rest of my high school years will never be the same ?

lemme just tell you all now. I FREAKING LOVE YOU. all of you. i'll never forget class of 2009 at john a. rowland high school. my seniors when i was a confused little freshie. what's gonna become of my life when you guys are gone ? i have no clue :o i know, i know, i'll live. hehe. but still. you guys mean everything. & you've made my year what it was. now it's over, and it's time to reminisce. it's time to let you all know the huge impact you've made in this one little girl's life.

to my three favorite seniors : kevin lim, eric chang, and hon hoang. you'll never understand how much i love you guys <3 all the things you've done for me, i will always appreciate every single second of my life that i've spent with the three of you.

kevin lim - thanks for all the rides in the past ! haha how many times have i said that ? but i really do appreciate you not wanting me to walk :] all the moments i've shared with you : the convos in the car & at southlands, all the times you made fun of me, all the times you hit me nd threw stuff at me, when you asked my brother for permission to be mean to me, when i talked to you about *ahem* hehe, talking at jack in the box, basketball, pool, your little brother, finding out about your big brother, walking to chriscelle's locker after 5th period [hehe JKL + C], going to david's house, going to your house, seeing you walk out of the bathroom in just your boxers -_-, wow we've been through a lot. HEHE. so thanks for everything, kevin. you've always been, and will always be, my numbero uno di yi ge favorite senior. you've been like a big brother to me, always. just like a big brother, you make me feel stupid. you make me feel unloved. but all at the same time, just like a big brother, you make me feel like i'm important :) like today, you hugged me so tight, i could tell you cared :) i'm gonna miss you so much, you don't even know. i'm like about to cry right now. i know i'll still be seeing you after today, but still. go to my church ! hehe, LOVE YOUUU <3

eric chang - omg, you're right. this has been a "too-brief" friendship. but WAIT ! it's not over :) notice i didn't say "yet", meaning of course it'll never be over ;D hehe so yeah, i haven't known you for too long. but yeah, you're one of my favorites ! you've got this..vibe. hehe. i mean, you know you're one of the nicest people i know. & you're just like, genuinely happy. i love that about you. you're always so carefree & you don't ever seem to be stressed out. totally opposite from me. haha. and you know, i really do admire you. & there are few people that i can say that about. my year would not have ended the way it did [wonderfully] if i hadn't met you. hehe. so sitting on the bench in front of the hideout, taking pictures, talking, eating ice cream, playing basketball, playing basketball with kevinlim's little brother :D, nd alla that. i'll miss every moment i spent with you. i really hope to hang out a lot in the summer, and for you to take me to that graffiti art place one day :), cuhs you're just so fun to be around ! i love you lots, & i'll miss you, even though we'll see each other ;)

hon hoang - yeeee ! i remember how we met. bumped into each other every single day in art. hahaha it was quite funny. shh, don't tell. but mariel & dabbie [idk if you know them] used to always tell me you liked me -_- they were crazy little kids. hehe. so then i realized you were in my math class too ! YAAY :D so we started talking more & more & more, nd lookie now ! you're one of my favorite seniors :) thanks for the graduation ticket, even though i didn't need it -_- haha but still, thanks. and thanks for making fun of me all the time. thanks for lowering my self-esteem every day and always telling me to do stuff for you. thanks for inviting me to play basketball at pathfinder park during spring break, thinking i wouldn't show up. thanks for the fun talks and letting me follow you around whenever i had no friends with me and nowhere to go. thanks for a great time, and a great year. thanks for a lot of things, eh ? i'm gonna miss you a loot, and i love youuuu ! <3

so here's all my love poured out to you guys. here's what i have to say, and i'm probably forgetting a lot of it anyways. i want you to know that i'll always remember you guys & i'll always cherish our moments together. i'm only fifteen, i've only just finished my first year in high school, while you guys just finished your last. but when i grow old & when i'm like 75, i'll still look back and think, kevinlim, ericchang, honhoang, they left their footprints in my life and on my heart, and i'll never let that go. i love you guys & i'm gonna miss you guys when you're gone.
- - - - - - - - - - - -
so here's to the rest of my seniors : i love you guys too, & don't you forget it. i'm sorry if i was ever annoying hehe. cuhs i know some of you might have been thinking at times, "who does this freshman think she is ? tryna hang with us seniors all the time" haha, that's why i didn't always ask to go places with you. but anywho, let's forget about that for now :) let's look back on how YOU guys affected my life <3

abraham park - you're the first senior i EVER talked to. besides eric johnson, but i was never as close to him as i was to the rest of you :) and that first time, i was pretty much talking to both of you at the same time anyways haha. but i'm never gonna forget that you're the reason i met the rest of 'em. you know, i've always envied your beautiful voice. it's extremely unique, and you can go far with it, along with your amazing guitar-playing skills, hehe. and i still remember the first time we jammed too :) you can say some pretty mean things sometimes, but overall you're also one of the nicest people ever. i hope you go far, in whatever you wanna succeed in, and don't ever forget to keep smiling. cuhs that smile of yours is one of the prettiest i've seen :)

david wang - aaaahh you're so big & huggable ! LMAO hehehe. you've got the heart & mind of a child, and no that's not a bad thing :) spongebob & cookies. that's what i'll always remember about you hehe. and how many instruments can you play again ? you're pretty cuh-raazy, since the only other person i know [uhh, i WISH i knew him] that can play so many instruments is wang leehom, and he is quite amazing. don't ever stop with your guitar cuhs who knows, maybe one day you'll just be playin' for fun and someone suicidal will walk by and hear you. this person ain't gonna wanna kill himself no more ;) HEHEHEH IDK. so thanks for everything this year :) thanks for the rides home & to yogurtland nd stuff. and thanks for letting me to go your house that one time. thanks for all the fun & jammin', & you know what ? just thanks for everything. prom picture ! please don't forget :)

jack lin - yeeee i remember when we met. abe & david were singing, and you were sitting next to abe while i was sitting behind them. they stopped singing & i decided to ask, "hey, what's your name ?" "jack" "wait, what ?" "jack." "jack ?" "yeah" "oh haha i'm lydia. nice to meet you :)" HEHEHEHE just kidding, i'm not sure if that's exactly what happened. but it's close enough ! i remember you wouldn't tell me your last name. then all the talks we had, i still remember those too. that one monday when you were sitting at the table all alone, the only time i ever saw a senior do homework haha. i think you were doing physics. so i decided to sit down with you and do my math ! haha. so i looked at your paper and i saw your last name :) i remember that day, we talked about what i wanted to do when i grow up haha. then you had to leave LMAO. then one of those other days when the other seniors left you, we were standing at the corner of the school, talking about what college you wanted to go to, and how i don't know why i'm so crazy about doing so well in school. whoa we talked about pretty serious stuff, huh ? hahaha. so david's house was fun, and so was pool, and basketball. nd i gotta say, you're pretty good ! and i heard you can bench 300. i'm jealous. LMAO. i'm gonna miss you muchoo ! <3

cliff ahn - omg ! your voice. haha i remember watching the suessical, i was sitting in the first row & i'm pretty sure you looked at me like once LMAO. but at that time we didn't know each other yet. then one day i was singing with abe and you came along. that was the first time you heard me sing hehe :] then i had to go to practice ! lmao. then i officially met you in girard's class becuhs of youknowwho :) i remember being mean to you for a couple of minutes, then i said, fine fine i'll be nice to you :) so that's how we became friends ! you're whack, you know that ? hehe i mean you're willing to do the craziest stuff. you don't care what people think about you, you're just..you. haha that's good :] all the jammin' was fuun, but please don't forget about bu de bu ai. i still wanna record that ! cuhs it would be so cool :) LOVE YOUUU <3

tyrone [TJ] onias - HEY YOU ! aw i didn't talk to you too much this year, but i'll definitely miss you a looot. i remember the first time i talked to you. we were in the hideout and you took a picture of me with david's cool camera hehe. it was you, me, and jaack. i was wearing that yellow sweater of mine and you used the color accent thing on david's camera. you showed me the picture and called me a banana. jack agreed ! >:O hahahah so the next time i saw you you called me a banana and stuff. but i was wearing white, and so were you. you said fine, then you're a marshmallow. nd i said you were a burnt marshmallow :) so from that day on, i was banana and you were marshmallow hehe. i remember the first time you asked for a hug. i think it was that day too. i remember staying up til like 1:00 am the night before renaissance, making a sign for you that said "marshmallow, you're the best" :) i remember you helping me with the dance at choir auditions. marshmallow, you're the best. and i'm gonna miss you looots <3

[this post is getting too long. continued on the post above ! :)]

ugh

my dad pisses me off.

hey guys

i'm at kurt's house !
his 15th birthday party :o
i've been here since like 12 nd i've been doing nothing but eating.
heheheheh i'm such a fatty.
kevin suh was like, are you on your period ? LMAO
cuhs i was eating so much..hahahah

so i was reading my yearbook this morning.
every single word on every single page :)
i was reading for like two hours, and i'm only on like page 25 -_-

brian's sitting next to me saying, "you should blog about me"
HEHEHEH

so anyways, ericchang, i read your page ! you're so sweet ! omg i cried hehe

anywhoooooooo peace outt !
love, lyd <3

p.s. too bad i have to leave early, again. stupid saturday afternoon-night parties -_-
always have to leave early...

i don't want to keep letting my life pass me by
every morning, every day, i fail to make myself try
to make something of myself, something important to me
to do something that will make everyone see
that i'm more than just a girl, more than just someone to use
more than just that one person who's always confused
i want to live my life as best as i can
but i need someone who's willing to give me a hand
i can't do this on my own, if i try i won't succeed
a friend who's always by my side is just that person i will need
Jesus, will you please be my Guide ?
i know that You're someone in whom i can always confide
You'll take my by the hand, and you'll keep pulling me through
no matter how far i fall, i know You'll always be true
so Jesus, will You please carry me on ?
i put my life into Your hands, and for you this is my song

i really hate

when i'm super busy & i need to contact a lot of people and not even one of them picks up. i effing forgot my math book at school, so i'm screwed for my precalc finals unless i can do all those review problems on monday night. so i wanna borrow someone's math book. but no one's picking up. i got a text about basketball practice today and i'm freaked out cuhs i left my phone at home today so i didn't get the text til i got home and i didn't go to practice or whatever it was. and she's not freaking picking up. my crabs are really getting on my nerves. i wish they would just behave -_- i've got a lot on my mind and i'm tryna calm myself down by eating this orange. and i don't think it's working. i've got to talk to kelsey alone but i never get to, but maybe that's my fault. i've got so much going on, idk what to do. i need to read so much of my bio book and i really really really don't want to. i wish it was summer already. fml. eff finals. eff school. aiyah i hate my life.

lyd.

haha

sorry i sound depressed in that entry.
i'm not, really.
i can't think of what song to listen to anymore.
i don't like putting my stuff on shuffle.
hm, idk. my ipod broke down today.
idk what happened.. -_-
maybe it just ran out of batteries. i hope so

so i finished my hw at like 10 today. that's considered early !
cuhs i was wasting my time on the interneet. nd i usually finish at like 11 or 12 at the earliest -_-
i can't wait til the day i can come home from school nd sleep by 8. haha

whoa. i just suddenly feel so confused.
am i happy with life ? i'm not even sure.
it's like everything in life is so bittersweet.
nothing that's all good, nothing that's all bad [if you really think about it]

seniors are leaving. two more days nd idk if i'll ever see them again.
my life has passed by so fast..nd it's just gonna keep going faster.

well i wanted to express my love for my seniors, so here goes :)

but to the rest of youu
peace outt
love, lyd <3
- - - - - - - - - -
hey seniors !
you know i love you all. i think eric's the only one that reads my blog. hahah too bad :) i'm so glad i met all of you this yearr. nothing's gonna be the same without c/o 'o9 omgg. the groupp ! what happened to the jammin' ? :o well it's okay. just hangin' out was fun :) i'm never gonna forget you guyss, nd i'm always just a phone call away if you need me ;) i know, i know. i'm just a little freshie nd you guys don't care too much about me :[ but you'll always be special in my heartt <3 all the memories from my freshman year, hangin' out with you guys nd stuff hehe. i'll be growin' old nd i'll still be thinkin' about you guys. oh yeah cliff follows my blog too HAHA but i have no idea if he actually reads it ! hahaha anywho. bracelet making, basketball, ice cream, frozen yogurt, david's house, kevin's housee, etc. every moment of it was boomb ;) i really don't know what will become of our school after you guys are gonee. goin' out into the real world, finally out of high school nd into college. buncha you are goin' to mt. sac so you better come visit :) love you allll !
much love,
lyd <3

i constantly feel like writing

but i feel like i only get one line every time. hm..
it's like there's nothing that inspires me anymore.
used to be love, but where did that go ?
it's all gone.
my heart was smashed into pieces, and much more, months ago.
so how can i write about love ?
the heartbreak still remains, but it was long ago enough to not feel the need to write about it anymore.
but there's this poem that i wrote a couple of months ago.
i guess i'll share that with you now.
- - - - - - - - - -
"he looks at me with empty eyes"
by lydia lei

moment by moment
day by day
our eyes were blinded
the minutes wasted away

i look back, way back
remembering, reminiscing
of the moments we had
of the feelings we shared

the look in his eyes
as he gazed into mine
the sudden rush of suffocation
as he held on to my body
as i was saying goodbye

not letting go
yet not holding on strong
the difficulty of figuring
where did i go wrong

at moments
it's really all just a blur
his look, his touch
his lips locked on mine

sometimes i wish
it was all just a dream
hoping one day it'll all
just come back to me

but now i see
it needed to end
there was no way
he and i could be friends

i try to smile
i try to wave
but i realize he isn't
trying to do the same

he stares past me
at the girl beyond
his eyes divert quickly
hoping not to meet mine

but he sees me, he stares
he doesn't know what to say
i reluctantly accept
now i understand

the moments we had
the feelings we shared
gone, all gone
and now
i've come to realize

he looks at me with empty eyes

wow

not a bad week. [so far]
--> sunday was fun at church practicing for vbs music, then asia buffet with the fambam
--> monday was fun at christeng's housee, with the ramen & jogging & praying & staying over til like 11
--> today's presentation was way better than expected. i'm surprised kevin suh wasn't the hater today haha. it was the rest of his group ! >:o big change of events, eh ? hahah idk. so no more chinese hw for the rest of the year. nd we're gonna have a party ! idk which day though. mm weight training was fun, i think i improved :) thanks to ericchang for the icecreeam, nd arieo, i'll pay you back ! after tennis tryouts i kinda hung with jen & kanow :) oh yeah btw, HAPPY BIRTHDAY JENNIFER LIU <3

so we bought our house. i think we'll be moving in like a month. i don't know if i'm excited or scared or worried or what. it's all just so confusing ! leaving this home that i've lived in for like eight years..both my past houses i lived in for about three years. so this is pretty crazy, i'd say. i'll miss you, 195. well i guess this is all in God's plan :) so don't fret, girly. just go with the floow

can't wait til the alhambrans come to iv to help out :) it's exciting !

nd i've got tons of plans from now to the end of the summer. i feel like the busiest person alive ! omgg

school's almost out, 'o9 is nearly gone. i'm gonna miss you guys more than you'll ever knoooow. but i guess like eric said, next year we'll have new seniors, then the next year's seniors, then we'll be seniors. whoa. jack's always told me it's gonna go by fast. i'm scared

i can't do choir ! cuhs of asb.

wow. i haven't blogged in so long i just have so much to say.
actually, i have blogged, but about little things, nd with little time. ahh

well i've got this essay to do now, soo..

peace outt
love, lyd <3

p.s. good luck kanow with the scrapbook <3