"there's something i gotta say to you

but i'm so afraid of what you'll do
i'll just admit this to you now
that i'm stuck on you like glue somehow" - ajrafael

haha okay now really. there's something i gotta say to you :
i'm sorry.

i'm a complete and total hypocrite, aren't i ? i really don't know if you read my blogs or not, but i hope you do. there's no need for you to respond to this, i just want you to know. nd hopefully you know who you are. today you were standing there, practically right next to me. nd i didn't say hi, hello, hey, or whatever i could've said. i didn't even look at you, nd that's exactly the one thing i hate about how you treat me. i'm sorry, i really am. i realized it after i left, nd i was pretty mad at myself. i guess today i realized how much of a hypocrite i really am : very much. i hope that's gonna change.

---------------

mkay so, these past couple of days, i've been feeling pretty good :) it's an amazing feeling ! i feel so carefree and crazy, just like how i used to. am i finally getting back ? i hope so. thank you, God, once again. :) raaawr, i've been having so much fun lately ! it's wonderful.

040809
didn't blog about my day cuhs i was blogging about mariel. hahaha ;) so anyways, hangout at my house with LJN2. i love when we have group projects, it's just the four of us nd we talk about so much stuff. but they always make me sing. kanow really treats me like an ipod. hahahaha, an ipod who can play with her hair. so then i went to souplantation with jess nd her family. haha i love her parents :) they're so funny ! nd uh, i think that's pretty much all i remember about that day. haha

040909
wowowow, jampacked daay ! ofcourse, as usual, i woke up nd went to school. basketball practice 2 to 3 ish. weight room til 4:30. ts emporium to apply for new contacts or whatever. omg i saw ms. hu, it was scary. i successfully avoided her :) then i went home to change nd i left for souplantation, again. i was there for like two nd a half hours 6-8:30. cuhraazy. i was with the truongs, vickie, nd christinetsang at first. then wizzang, kevinlim, joan, nd eric came nd i went to sit with them. then kanow nd them came. then panda came ! yaay :) he said rowland sucks cuhs he had to buy a drink -_- but whatevers, i gave him two bucks. had to get phillip to give it to him cuhs he wouldn't accept it from a girl -_- haha thanks phillip ! mm, met simba nd awesome kawewome the possom ? hahaha idk how to spell it ! then i went to hang with kanow, jess, teng, ed, danny, bill, nd jaspeer for a while. then i finally left. got home, got in a fight with my mom :[ then baked a cake for abe. made a bracelet for kevinlim while i was waiting for the cake. ohyeah, i made a bracelet for hon the night before. sooo, after the cake, i did my hw, didn't finish bio cuhs i fell asleep from 12-4 am. I FAIL :D hahaha so yeah. then today happened.

nothing much to blog about today ahahah
i have a second diary entry though. i'll post a new entry for that ;)

- lyd <3

p.s. i have a friend out there who's goin' through some hardships. but you know what ? hard ships don't sink very easily ; they're always gonna be there. but you gotta know how to get past them to the next island. you're never gonna get to the one that's shaped like a perfect circle cuhs there's no way you're life's ever gonna be perfect. but i know that one day you're gonna get to that one that's shaped like a banana with two circles on the concave [?] side. no, not becuhs it's "hao chang o" -_- it's cuhs it's a happy face ! of course you can't spend every moment of your life bein' happy, but you can try to keep that smile up cuhs you never know, your smile might mean the world to someone out there, at least one day. nd one day you're gonna be satisfied enough with your life to put that smile on your face. be strong, nd you'll get through it. it's something everyone goes through, do you see everyone else giving up ? i don't. stay strong :)